"What do you DO in your everyday is what makes a life, not what house you happen to inhabit? A home is a place to come back to when you've been away, it's a place to invite your tribe in, it's a place of solitude and of rest and it's certainly more than bricks and mortar isn't it?"
If you've been following my Facebook or Instagram, you'll know that I had a fabulous time in Germany and Austria over the past few weeks but one thing that became very clear was a sense of 'home'. It's a theme that comes up regularly in my life, see here. I became aware of being somewhere quite literally foreign to my sense of belonging and yet, I felt completely at home on the road on my own. Which made me wonder, what is home? Is it a place or a feeling? Is it a connection to a community or a physical building? What is it which gives us such a strong emotional attachment to 'home'?
I accidently referred to my birthplace (Tasmania) as 'home' during my trip away and it got me thinking about what it means to me. I'm currently reading Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari and it really puts into focus our place as human beings in the world. Traditional societies lived where food was plentiful or could be harvested but today why do we choose to live where we do? Why do we feel the need to move from one place to another? Why do some people never leave the place they were born? And is 'home' simply a contrived place in our species' active imaginations?
I'm constantly fascinated by those television programmes which show wealthy Baby Boomers moving to the countryside or another country and being obsessed with the house that they buy, but isn't a home more than the structure that you live in? What do you DO in your everyday is what makes a life, not what house you happen to inhabit? A home is a place to come back to when you've been away, it's a place to invite your tribe in, it's a place of solitude and of rest and it's certainly more than bricks and mortar isn't it?
I've spent my entire life looking for a place to call home and for a brief time in 2008-2014, I had it - I had a safe home to live in, a lovely community, close to family and all the services I could possibly need - and I let it go. Whatever it is within me that drives me to keep moving to new places, to new adventures, to a life full of variety rather than stability may be that primitive hunting and gathering instinct that humans stopped (in most humans) following with the Agricultural Revolution 10,000 years ago. It could be a behaviour learned from moving away from my "tribe" at 4 years old and be residual trauma from that time, but it might also be a sense of not feeling at home within myself, within my life.
When I was away, without thought of ties to my everyday life to my kids, my partner, my job, my life - the things that seem to define me at the moment - I felt more like myself than I have in a long time, I felt at home with me, I felt aligned with the Universe, or whatever you want to call it, and I felt a sense of purpose in just being me in the moment. Travelling does more than create great images and memories, we can live in a way that is not contrived in a work-eat-sleep-repeat social slavery routine, there's a real sense of freedom with being on the road and being disconnected from societal expectations and lives - we get to define it ourselves. And in that space, while I was a long way away from my physical house that I live in, I felt, for just a brief time, at home within myself. So now, I have the excitement (or challenge) of finding that sense of home in my daily life, so my whole life feels like an adventure safely in the home that is me.
©Alyssa Curtayne 2019