"In the movie Chocolat, Vianne travels from place to place until she decides that the village is worth staying in, a place where she felt welcomed, but more-so a place where she can meaningfully contribute to the community."
I've been reflecting lately on what "Home" is and I guess it's been a theme throughout my life. When I was in my teens, Australian rock band, Noiseworks had a song called "Home" and their lyrics spoke of not being able to find a place and a constant longing to find this ethereal place.
It resonated with me so much. It still does. It remains one of my favourite songs of all time. So I've spent much of my life seeking out this elusive "home". On the journey, I've been to some spectacularly beautiful places.
In 2011, I packed up my three children and with a four-wheel drive and camper trailer went on an adventure around Australia. I suppose in some way I was looking for this place to call home. I found it in Broome on Australia's remote North-West, the crystal blue water was my sanctuary every afternoon as I walked the Cable Beach and watched the sun go down. But the other thing that made Broome home was this intangible connection that I felt with the land and the people there.
Soon, I left Broome for a variety of reasons and moved to Perth where we have now moved three times in the five years we have lived here. I can't settle in this place. It just doesn't feel like home. I recently returned from five days away from Perth and I felt sick knowing that we weren't going home, but back to a house. So I question whether home is about the place or is it something deeper.
I am a seventh-generation Tasmanian and apart from Broome, my birthplace is the only other location that has truly resonated. But it's more than that. A home is just a place you live unless you have a community to belong to. With all our fancy houses and expensive possessions, what we are lacking is community and I feel that here, I don't feel a sense of community in the place that I live. Broome had a wonderful community and I feel right at home in my own birth-state around family and friends and the familiarity of community. Which made me wonder if home a place or is it something within us? In the movie Chocolat, Vianne travels from place to place until she decides that the village is worth staying in, a place where she felt welcomed, but more-so a place where she can meaningfully contribute to the community.
"Home" is greater than a place. It's a concept that is within us; a feeling of things being just right and that things are as they should be. I guess we can apply this same concept of belonging to relationships, jobs and other aspects of our lives. I think ultimately it's about trusting those inner nudges that we get that something is not quite right and being able to follow that and feeling at home within ourselves. Moving location, changing jobs, leaving relationships are just a way of trying to right this internal feeling of unease, when what we need to do in the first place is to trust that intuitive nudge that says "this is not right, this doesn't feel like home" and act on that.
May you find your home within you.
©Alyssa Curtayne 2018