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In this predicament, I don't think I am alone - I think many people are feeling this extreme feeling of believing the best in people to thinking that perhaps a global extinction would not be a bad thing.
I find myself in a bit of an ethical and moral predicament. On one hand I believe wholly and solely in the ability and potential of the human being to be the most wonderful creature ever created, and on the other, I despair at the nastiness, greed and psychopathy of the human species. It's like at this point in time we are witness to the complete duality of light and dark, good and evil and wonder and despair...
Interestingly, I wrote a blog about the idea of duality here just over 12 months ago and how we waiver between these two extremes within ourselves and perhaps it is learned behaviour. I'm starting to think that what we are witnessing both internally and globally of these two extremes is a reflection of our current state of consciousness - that is, one of duality. But what if there was another way?
In this predicament, I don't think I am alone - I think many people go from feeling and believing the best in people, to thinking that perhaps a global extinction would not be a bad thing. This feeling of surrender to our fate, for me, comes at the most unusual times, like watching a documentary, or seeing yet another person respond with vitriol and hate online and I wonder if it isn't in our destiny to go down this dark path of human ego and psychopathy.
And yet, the depth within me feels this enormous well of love for Earth and all of life.
These feelings couldn't be more polarised.
And I guess it comes down to this: I cannot and should not have responsibility for any other person on Earth, except myself. I can only spend time and energy on my own self, on my own inner work. And yet, this polarisation within me IS MY INNER WORK! And it's so very hard to let go of the need to prove others wrong - which is a reaction of the ego.
I cannot argue my way out of a ego-centred debate around the climate crisis, or politics or even religion without losing a part of the goodness that exists within me. These online arguments come at a cost - to me, to my light. When I engage in the darkness that exists outside of me, it creates a darkness within myself - it dims my light and my happiness. But somewhere within me I feel some obligation, or sense of responsibility that I need to fight this darkness - after all, every good novel or movie has this story line - but what if it is what human consciousness needs to experience at this point in time? What if I just surrender to what is? And where is that line between apathy and surrender?
What if there was another way for humanity to be that wasn't about these extremes of light and dark, good and evil, wonder and despair? What if those extremes are our outward projections of our inner work that we avoid? What if, by trying to show others the fault in their ways, we are actually preventing them from reaching their own inner realisations?
This blog will not find the solutions to this problem, but I do know that a new way of being is just around the corner, I'm just not sure how to get there, and maybe I'm not meant to know. But at the end of writing this blog, I feel closer to it than when I started.
©Alyssa Curtayne 2019
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